Although it seems to degrade all other facets of my existence, the pain I feel in your absence serves as my most loyal and consistent reminder of you. I happily bear the burden of my anguish if to shed it would mean to sacrifice but a moment of your splendid memory.
The passage of time may ease the pain, but I pray it not dull the memories I so cherish. It is through such memories that I experience you each and every day. I gladly embrace the pain if doing so keeps your image fresh in my mind.
I shall bear my burden with gratitude, taking comfort in my dreams where your voice is ever heard and your touch felt.
The place in my heart where you reside continues to grow. It has become abundantly clear that the possibility of loving another as I have loved you is too remote to mention. Perhaps this is my story then... A life accompanied by ever-present heartache. In spite of everything, the mere thought of your beautiful visage cleanses my soul and takes the weight of my sorrow until my cruel mind clutters the image with other things - all trivial in comparison.
As most nights, I shall apply my sincerest effort in the suppression of all extraneous thoughts and concentrate entirely on you. This is the best possible way to fall asleep.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Every Day
You are the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced.
I hate to reduce myself to such trite superlatives, but I really have no other way of illustrating the distinction between you and everything else. From your exquisite physical beauty to your depth of character, your humility to your ambition, and your tenderness to your ferocity, your every aspect stands unique in its wonder. I need only think of you for a moment before losing all other thoughts and finding myself awestruck.
The past few few weeks have been weird. I have begun trying to imagine a future without you. I have tried to envision myself in ten, twenty, thirty years. The strangest thing about this is that my images are always in black and white. There is no colour or sound. Without you, there is indeed no beauty at all.
I don't think it would be possible for me to love another. I have attempted to imagine that as well. Aside from making me physically uncomfortable, such thoughts present a serious issue. Since I have experienced the most lovely and wonderful company I could ever hope for, I can do little to avoid comparing all others by that standard. Naturally, everyone falls short. There is only you.
I lay awake, yet again, staring into your eyes. I remember when I asked you to take a picture of yourself as you awoke so in your absence I could look upon you as though we were together. This picture, which I still have and treasure has proven to be a gift above all others. Once again I find myself captivated, hopelessly, by your stunning visage and the worlds of complexity contained in your subtle gaze.
To this day, this remains my preferred practice before sleep. Some nights, those through which I am unable to claim a moment's sleep, I am grateful to have that picture to keep me company.
I hate to reduce myself to such trite superlatives, but I really have no other way of illustrating the distinction between you and everything else. From your exquisite physical beauty to your depth of character, your humility to your ambition, and your tenderness to your ferocity, your every aspect stands unique in its wonder. I need only think of you for a moment before losing all other thoughts and finding myself awestruck.
The past few few weeks have been weird. I have begun trying to imagine a future without you. I have tried to envision myself in ten, twenty, thirty years. The strangest thing about this is that my images are always in black and white. There is no colour or sound. Without you, there is indeed no beauty at all.
I don't think it would be possible for me to love another. I have attempted to imagine that as well. Aside from making me physically uncomfortable, such thoughts present a serious issue. Since I have experienced the most lovely and wonderful company I could ever hope for, I can do little to avoid comparing all others by that standard. Naturally, everyone falls short. There is only you.
I lay awake, yet again, staring into your eyes. I remember when I asked you to take a picture of yourself as you awoke so in your absence I could look upon you as though we were together. This picture, which I still have and treasure has proven to be a gift above all others. Once again I find myself captivated, hopelessly, by your stunning visage and the worlds of complexity contained in your subtle gaze.
To this day, this remains my preferred practice before sleep. Some nights, those through which I am unable to claim a moment's sleep, I am grateful to have that picture to keep me company.
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